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Alyssa Chitwood

The Importance of Wedding Day Music

Hey Beautiful Readers! 


Regarding receptions, we generally all share a similar sentiment as the hosting couple: how do we hear all the music we love and want to hear, but also ensure our guests are having a great time and keep everyone glued to the dancefloor. If your reception's goal is not maximizing your dancing time with a packed dancefloor, admittedly this blog may not be relevant for your planning needs. Each reception is unique so don’t feel conformed to anything, there so many fun activities and extras you add into your reception, get creative and find a planner with expertise in a variety of reception styles!  


We could go on for hours about the DJ vs. Band debate, but it makes no difference. Pick whichever you prefer, maybe the one you feel is more likely to have the music you want to hear, or maybe it’s a budget concern, but sometimes you can even find a combination of both. 


Each portion of the wedding should be matched with a particular theme and playlist. There are more “portions” than most people will probably consider; think about the following when creating your wedding day playlists: 

  • Pre- ceremony

  • Ceremony

  • Cocktail hour 

  • Entrances 

  • Dinner 

  • Dancing

  • Last song/ private dance

  • Cue songs (don’t worry, I’ll explain) 


Pre-ceremony is music you’re never going to hear but you should give a suggested playlist or example songs to set the mood. For example, if you and your partner don’t like country music at all make sure your guests aren’t walking in to Luke Combs and Blake Shelton songs. My husband and I listen to electronic music so we had a lot of acoustic and melodic music playing throughout that part of the day. 


Your ceremony (even the exit), entrances, first dance and last song selections are not playlists rather specific songs. Each moment should be assigned a song. Sometimes they’re the same, others they are different. Make sure your coordinator and whoever is playing music are on the same page about what songs should be playing when which aspects of the ceremony are happening. You don’t want the violinist to all of a sudden play the bride's song while the flower girl is walking down the aisle. It’s the small details that your planners are hired to think about. 


Two critical things about cocktail hour; the first - it is not the same vibe as your pre-ceremony music. The cocktail hour is a time to get people excited, play radio hits, today's classics, in the genre you listen to but also not straying too far away from mainstream hits that are sure to get everyone in a good mood. The second, this is also not your reception; and oftentimes even if you’ve taken photos beforehand, you are distracted and pulled in too many directions to actually enjoy any of it. I would suggest having a pre-selected radio playlist or “happy beats” in your preferred genre to play during this time. 


Make your grand reception entrance a moment to remember! That’s all I have to say. Use the final dancing song as a cue to come together (if you aren’t already) and make sure all of your people circle you on the dancefloor to share in one final celebration. Your private last dance can be a moment of more intimacy between you both. One last dance in the room you designed, just you two, to a special song, it’s the perfect seal to the evening before your grand exit! 


Dinner time is a small but mighty portion of music that often gets overlooked. You can just continue the same playlist as cocktail hour, or you can go with a slightly more upbeat but still toned down hits playlist. We used songs that were more mellow but still from the likes of our favorite musical performers including John Summit, Kygo, Louis The Child, Avicii, Clean Bandit, Phillip Phillips and more. We also walked around and greeted all of our guests during the dinner portion of the reception so this was good background music for that. If you’re sitting and enjoying the meal with your guests you may be comfortable with light basic background music. Keep in mind that the dinner portion of the evening is often dragged out at the end. Inevitably the first few tables that got their food have finished long before the last and are waiting around. Keeping the music slightly more exciting and upbeat can keep your guests from falling into a lull and make sure the energy is high come dancing time.



We’ve covered the individual moments but what about the important stuff… when people are actually dancing.Setting the tone for your reception happens with the very first song. I didn’t even mention this one as it’s own category but it is so pivotal for the evening. There comes a time in every reception where the guests are getting tired of sitting around and everyone is ready for a new drink and some “Dancing Queen”. Your coordinator, DJ, and caterer should all be on the same page regarding the point in the timeline when it’s time to kick things up a notch. The most important thing is for the couple to hit the dance floor as soon as possible. If you’re out there, other people will be out there - and that reigns true for the entire night. 


I’ve got a big one for you, there are two additional sub playlists I am going to ~highly recommend~ you make for your reception. 1. Do not play & 2. Must Play. Your do not play list might include the likes of the cha cha slide or the wobble; maybe a song from a last relationship or maybe just songs you really don’t like. On the contrary your must play list includes the songs you know you NEED to hear that night. I’d keep this list short and sweet maybe 5-8 songs as you don’t want the DJ or Band to have no room for creative freedom. This list should be sprinkled throughout the open dancing during the reception and not only ensure you’re getting to dance and sing along to your favorite tunes, but also be a cue or reminder to come back together if you and your new husband or wife have ventured off or found yourselves dancing with different people! 

 

Now that you’ve got your must play and do not play lists handled, what about the other few hours of the evening that you need to account for. Oftentimes both DJs and bands will have a good idea of what style of music you’d like to set the tone for the evening and can play off of your “musts”. Your goal should be to have everyone from kids to grandkids locked on the dancefloor and enjoying all of the music. If you wanted to go the extra mile and get your guests involved you could:

  • send out a song request with your invitation and ask your guests to request one song they’d like to hear during the reception in their RSVP. 

or

  • Have a song request jar during cocktail hour that your dj or band can pull from later on in the evening.


You can, of course, take the easy and simpler route of selecting music that you and your partner enjoy, and maybe taking some input from your parents to get some music from other generations in the mix! Some DJ’s and Bands prefer to know going into it, so if you are going to take the route of guest suggestions or requests, just make sure you communicate that ahead of time. 


Did you think you could read a whole 3 pages on creating the playlists for your wedding? Well you just did. The entertainment is one of the most important and memorable aspects of your wedding day, don’t glaze over it without true thought! 


Xoxo,

Alyssa 


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